It's your time! Create the relationship you desire (Starting with Yourself)

Video Dated: Oct 28, 2022

All right, it looks like we are live Three, two, and one. Action. Good morning, guys. How are you? I hope you're having a great week. I know we're coming up at the end of October. Do you have any plans for Halloween or anti-Halloween? Instead, dressing up as a Bible character or something fun or just relaxing? What are your plans I know it's going to be falling on Monday, I think this year, yeah, Monday?

So we're probably just going to be doing our regular day and relaxing. So whatever it is, you guys decide to have fun and be safe. Make sure the kiddos are enjoying themselves. And you guys are just really doing great as we're coming up into November, right? Oh my gosh. So what I'm going to be doing is offering you some support that can take you into the rest of this year.

Before I do that, let's go ahead and share this information with folks. So you can copy the link and share it or you can click share. And it's just important that people get this information. And that they understand. They're not alone, they don't have to deal with this stuff alone.

When we are not having a relationship with ourselves the way we want- feeling stressed, feeling anxious, feeling worried, and filled with self-doubt have to be perfect about everything. There's stress that holds you down, and it keeps you away from your goals, it keeps you away from your dreams, it keeps you not really focusing the way you want to in your relationship, then it's okay to be able to see, you know, we need some extra support, we need some extra. So go ahead and share it. So click over here, over to the right, and you're gonna see a share button, click that share button and share it, I just shared it to my story, and I'm also going to be sharing it to my Facebook page. And then you can also share it with different groups, people tend to think that this is something they're dealing with, that is something they have to kind of keep quiet.

And they can't tell anybody about it. And it just, doesn't feel right. And it's uncomfortable, and it doesn't, it's not safe. And you know, people will judge me, the biggest person judging you is you, first of all, that's essential to know. And that's why I do this program. I myself got involved in this years ago because I was dealing with stress and anxiety.

And I was dealing with being not good enough. And I was really good. Right? People didn't know I was dealing with this, they didn't know the levels of uncertainty that I had. Because I didn't let it show. I just did what I had to do.

But inside myself, it was escalating and escalating and escalating. And so there were these emotions and thoughts that always kept me feeling unsettled feeling like I wasn't a part of something. And I couldn't really talk about it. Because at times when I tried people didn't understand they would just overreact or be like, Oh my gosh, maybe you can't do this.

Do you know? No, that's just my thought. That's not the truth. Don't join in on it. But it's okay. People don't understand. They don't know how to help. It's not their job, they haven't been trained in it. So it's important that we ask the right people, otherwise, we go in the wrong direction.

I also had beautiful therapists, I love therapists, they actually collaborate with me all the time. But the work that I'm going to be sharing with clients and sharing with you, wasn't shared with me through therapists. And I had to go through various therapies and loads of personal development. Oh my gosh, my husband makes fun of me.

He's like, so what training are you doing now? Because I'm totally addicted to this next training. What's the next training? What's this new information, I have to have it to make me feel good enough. So yes, it is good to have training and information but it can go too far.

And a lot of us have taken this to a place of, I gotta have more, gotta have more before I can move forward. That's perfectionistic behavior. That's all it is. It's okay. There's nothing wrong with you. Just like there was nothing wrong with me. I was just stuck on some thinking that I thought were true.

And I was stuck on some behaviors that I thought were true. That's it. That's absolutely the only thing so you can let yourself relax, and realize there's nothing wrong with you. And we're going to go through a program that could actually help kind of clean up that old thinking clean up those old programs, right? You know, you're not a computer but the brain is much like a computer where we go on automatically, the mind is set. It's like the best computer ever.

Like there's no computer that's made like it, so like say for instance, when you didn't know how to drive before you learned how to drive it now you don't even think about it. When you didn't know how to eat. You're like I didn't know how to eat, yeah, a long time ago you didn't know how to eat you put your food in your hair and in your ears and up your nose and on the wall and in the floor, and you want to share it with everyone else by feeding their face. But you don't remember that because it was so long ago. That's how the brain works. That's how we were created, it just goes on automatically for us, we don't have to think about it.

That's how cool the mind is. The same thing, when you program a computer, the information is just in there, you pull it forward, you work on what you need to you save it in there, and it houses it, you can search for it in different ways. It's so cool, that you don't even think that your mind is a million times better. But you just don't always know how to use it.

And so what I learned is I didn't know how to use it, I had been treated in such ways that were very harmful growing up. And so I used various techniques to cope, like telling myself, I don't want to go outside anyway, I don't want to have friends anyways, I don't need to drink anyways, I'm not thirsty. Well, unfortunately, when we teach ourselves thoughts like that, or I'm not good enough, or it's okay, I'm not going to be I don't ever have to try that hard, or everybody's going to always be better than me or whatever it is that we tell ourselves to cope. We're training our subconscious mind that it's literally true. Now, our subconscious mind, it's kind of like a baby in a way, it's very focused on one thing.

So if you start to frighten it with scary stories, that's all I can focus on, or tries to push it away, because that's not healthy for it. And so you might find yourself having thoughts, thoughts, thoughts, thoughts, thoughts, thoughts, thoughts, thoughts or thoughts, about work about this, about that, about relationships, about your health, about you're not doing this, you're not doing that it's not this and all the not good enough, is where you might find yourself focusing on and it leaves you very stuck, it leaves you maybe choosing the wrong relationships, maybe not even realizing how you're choosing the wrong relationships, it just seems to be the same problem situation, but just a new person over and over and over and over again, you might find yourself not following through on things that you know you should be following through on.

But there's something we call procrastination or laziness. What else is it, there is something some experience you're having, that's frightening you to keep you moving forward into that. And you might not feel like it's a frightening experience, you might feel angry instead. Or you might feel frustrated and sad, or you might feel numb, instead, it's just the body's way to work through that stuff. So what we do is we take a look at what's the thought process you're going through, that's having your body feel what it's feeling that's making you continue to believe what you're believing that's keeping you stuck in that situation.

Guys, it is your time, I'm going to share my screen with you and go over a couple of things. Because you deserve to have the life of your dreams. You deserve to have a relationship that feels good, that you feel cared about you feel respected, you feel appreciated, you feel heard, and they feel the same thing. They feel loved, they feel appreciated, they feel connected, they feel the gratitude from you to them, and vice versa. Right? You're in the space of if I don't have you, what will my life look like?

And so that's why I appreciate having you. Now, here's where we start, however, we start with you. Right, with your partner, that's intimacy with you, I see. But with you into me, I see. That's the closest piece of intimacy that we're not taught.

And we think oh, yeah, okay, I got it now, intimacy into me, I see, I'll see. And to myself, I got it. No, we have to practice we have to see how we're not doing it. We've got to break that stuff up. We've got belief systems around it, and we've got proof around it.

We've got practice around that. But we don't have a practice around this other way. And so what I like to do is I like to take my life experience, I like to take my background of education, I have my bachelor's in psychology, and my master's in healthcare management and business.

I have basically 23 years of experience in different working with different populations at risk populations foster care, which also includes children who have been, you name it, right they have been, I was also a child in foster care. So you name it, I had been. And so I take that experience plus the from the time I was 17. Until now I don't stop learning about personal development. All of those different pieces of training that have been helping me grow my life and change my life have been helping me grow and help clients change.

Their thinking changed their way of being changed their actions changed how they create a relationship, change their limiting belief, change how they're able to speak up for themselves, and do it in a way that feels good and feels loving and creates a relationship versus creating conflict and aggression. Because maybe that's what they grew up with. Or maybe they didn't grow up with anything. Maybe there was nothing they were taught or learned. So it's just Is struggle. And then it just hurts.

And they're just left with that. So for me, to feel like I gotta get through life, let me turn that off which you just don't just turn off the hurt, you turn off all the emotions, and you think you're 100%. And you're like you're 100% with your family. But if you've got stuff shoved away and stuff turned off, then where's 100% of you? It's not there, it can't be there.

So when you allow yourself to know, the thoughts that you have, you're safe with the emotions you have your safe with, we can take a look at what's the subconscious belief, the subconscious programming that you've got going on. You could call it programming, you could call it a belief, you could call it whatever term it is you want to call it. It is what it is, as far as I'm having this automatic experience, and I can't seem to change it. I've tried therapy.

So I've tried coaching. I've even tried hypnotherapy, but it didn't work. Well, so did I. And it didn't work for me either. Not fully. I tried all of it. That's why I created this program. Because I saw what was missing. Because I had been through the trauma and it wasn't cleaning it up.

Because I had been through the I have to be perfect. And it wasn't helping me I had been through growing my business and I was still struggling and all of these things. And I'm transparent, I still have struggles to come up along the way. But I have these tools now. And I know where to go to ask, and I know what to do, which is what I teach you as well.

So even when they come up, because we don't want to get rid of our emotions, we want to be able to work through them. So they go away themselves. Sounds good. Guys, it is your time, it is your turn. You get to have this. You get to create the relationship that you desire, the health that you desire, as you create that relationship within yourself.

If you to have that, why not? Why not? Who says you can't? Who says you shouldn't? Maybe within you, there's a part that says that. We've got to work on that. And it's not hard work. It's new. So it may seem hard. But just like you're doing the work you're doing right now it's the same. So it's not scary. It's not what some clients have said, they've said, when they've come to look at this, they're just like, it's not going to work, it's going to fail, there's, it's not going to fail, it can't fail if you do what I asked you to do.

Because you and I are going to walk through step by step, I'm going to share with you different blueprints on what to do to make sure it works. Right now, I can't guarantee anything only because if I share with you what to do, and I say go do it and you don't Okay, well, there you go. But if you do it, I can guarantee you're going to have results, I can guarantee you're going to come back to me, I can guarantee you're going to tell me what works. And you're going to tell me what didn't work.

And I can guarantee we're going to help you do more of what did work and help you do what you need to do differently from what didn't work. I can guarantee all of that. Because that's what we're going to be doing. And so it is your time, look at that. Put yourself in that picture. Whether it's you and a partner, whether it's you and your future partner, whether it's you and your kids or their children, your parents, or whomever it is that you want to create that intimate relationship with.

And first and foremost, they want you to see that you looking in the mirror, having a different relationship with you then you've ever had. And you might be like, Well, I don't want to relationship with that person. Even more. So what this is for you? And it's okay. If you're like I don't like that person right now. I want to work on other stuff first, that's perfectly fine.

Because as you work on the other stuff, you and I are going to continue to help you to see you are an amazing person. You are doing an amazing job. You're doing everything you can to make the world a better place to make your family's world a better place. So then it's going to get better, you're going to get better, you're going to fall in love with that person. You deserve it. All right.

So I want to share with you how you're going to do that. And this is how you're going to do that. So you're going to be able to go to the website, intimate connection dot com (, the idea is you're going to go there you'll see the steps here might be a little small. You see if I can make that bigger yeah, it's bigger. You're just going to fill out some questions.

You're going to allow yourself to just be vulnerable and connect. You don't have to tell me everything. Just some basics on the challenges that you're looking at and what you want to work on or help your subconscious mind get prepared for. I am ready to make these changes. And even if it's scary for me, even if I think it's impossible, I'm going to find out what this lady is talking about. Because I can hear what she's saying, I can see she went through this too.

So maybe, and by the way, yes, this can work for anybody. I've worked with men, I've worked with women, I've worked with children. I've worked with people who are gay, I've worked with people who are straight, I've worked with people who are transgender. I have worked with people who are dying, I have worked with people who are giving birth, I've worked with people who are afraid to hurt, their children, I've worked with people who were afraid to hurt themselves.

I've worked with people who had accidentally hurt people, right car accidents, and, you know, accidentally hurt their kids or on purpose hurt them. But now they're in a place where they, you know, they realized they didn't mean to do that, right? And maybe hurting yourself. Didn't mean to do that. No matter what's going on in a person's life, are able to work on it, you do not have to sit and guilty and shame and judgment and criticism, or on the other side of things.

If you're trying to work on your business, and you're feeling stuck, and you're just not taking the steps that you need to do that's hurting you. That's confirming to you, you can't do it. It's not the truth. But you're creating a proof that proves you can't do it, that's hurting you that's hurting your business, that's hurting the progress you want to make. So no matter what direction we're going in, this helps you to make those changes. So instead of all that stuff, you're feeling like it's heavy on you.

You're feeling lighter, and lighter, and you're peeling it off, you're taking on these blueprints, I'm going to be sharing with you step-by-step how to do it. You know, people tend to say, don't worry about how you'll figure it out. Well, how are you going to figure it out? Let's figure it out. Let's know that you are an amazing creation. Let's know that you are so connected to the answers.

Whether you're asking out here or you're asking up there, you are connected. And so yeah, they're gonna come. But if you feel so much doubt and so much perfection that your mind your brain, your emotions are shut down. There is no how that's going to reach you. I've been there. Sometimes I still get there. That's why I have to reach out to my coach and ask for help. So know that you can do the same thing. Get on here, and fill out the application, it's actually super simple.

I've done it myself to kind of walkthrough, it takes like, a couple of minutes. If that, then you and I are going to have an appointment, just like we're doing right now. Only you're going to be engaging with me asking me questions, which I do ask for you guys to do here online. But most of you are shy. So you asked me personally, which is fine.

But you can ask questions here if you're not shy. You can also take this information and share it with folks, you can ask questions, even if you are shy, I'm a shy person, even though I'm coming on here live with you. Because I want to make sure you get this information. And then number three, number three, what we're going to do is we're going to come to a conclusion and help you create a plan for yourself on what it looks like, you can decide to do that plan with me. Or you can decide to do that plan on your own.

Aha, I had to do my plan on my own for a very long time. Because I had conversations if I don't have time to get help, I've got to work. I don't have the money to get help, I can't afford it. Well, what I've come to the conclusion of is I need to make the time because it's full of crap, right? If I need to make the time I make time, and all of a sudden, there's time, oh, I don't have time to do that.

But I'm sick, I gotta go to the hospital. Look, I just made a whole four hours of time that I didn't have my car got a flat tire, I just made time to go get it fixed. We do with our time what we do with our time. Now, you may need some help with that time management and balancing that for yourself. Being able to see it's not so much about managing time, because we can't manage it.

Time is going to happen without us. So what are we going to use with that time? And you know, for some of us, me included, takes practice, and I'm still practicing, because as things change schedule is gonna change again. So allow yourself to know no matter what it is, we're going to create an action plan for you. And then you're going to decide, okay, am I going to do this action plan with Tammy, and practice and get these blueprints and learn how to use them and practice them into my life and start to see the results?

Or am I going to see the results some other way? I'm cool with whatever it is that you want to do. Of course, I'm looking for you to work with me because I know this works. And I've got hundreds of clients that I can share it with. Actually, I'm at the point now where I'm into it.

I think I mentioned the 1000s I just haven't done this whole year to count my numbers. But yeah, it's it works. I know it works of any age of any situation as long as you do the work. So let me know. Fill it out. Get connected with me to get the relationships that you're looking for starting with yourself.

That's first and foremost. So now you'll be like, Oh my gosh, I know how to set boundaries for myself, I know how to ask for what I need, I know how to help my partner, listen to me, or I know how to find that new partner, I know how to look at what red flags I've been blind to, I know how to start setting boundaries around them, I know how to look for the green flags and look for that relationship I want. And I know how to stay away from those, you know, those things that I didn't know how to stay away from before where I kept picking the wrong person.

You're gonna know all of that, you're also going to be able to practice as an entrepreneur, I know how to help you step through these hoops, and things where you feel stuck. So let's step through and guys, what's going to have you like, keep waiting? Could be your stubbornness could be your pride could be your reasons. I had them too. So I don't blame you if you need to be in them. Don't wait too long. I'm 45. I wish I would have gotten all this stuff a lot sooner.

I started it sooner I started in my 30s. But I still had to learn it and implement it into my life. I didn't have me, I had to kind of sludge through like I was sort of in quicksand, you'll have me. So I'll be able to help you kind of lift you up. And we'll kind of put the platform you need. So the quicksand isn't there anymore, you're just walking like you're on concrete.

Or even better, you're walking like you're on beautiful golf breath, feels really good and really grounded and really relaxed. So I wanted to share that with you today. Because I'm starting my group again. I also do one on one. So as we're figuring out that plan, you can decide what's going to work for you, you go ahead up and go back to the top of this, you can see where to go.

Oh, and by the way, you'll see the testimonials, I forgot to mention those are on here. So you can apply to any one of these buttons that will take you to the same place. You can learn more about me here and read that and learn some of the stuff that I was sharing with you. And just know guys, that you are practicing training your mind you have been ever since you were little, you just didn't know it.

And now you're going to learn how to train your mind on purpose and clean up any crap, any negative thinking any hurtful stuff that you've had stored, you don't need to keep in there anymore. It's hurting you even if you're like, oh, I don't think about it anymore. Except for on days that end with why are just kidding. Even if it's not cleaned up. And it's just sort of hanging out in the background. It still has its impacts.

We don't need that don't need that. So let's get that cleaned out. Come to this page, intimate (, fill out the application, get your information on here, and get set up with me, this week, I only have three spots available. So jump on it. Because I don't want to run out of time. And I'm only offering 15 spots. Because I want to make sure this stays personal.

I want to make sure that I'm engaging with you talking to you about what's going on with you. And one of the things that folks in my group, say which I love is they're like, I'm part of this group, not only am I working on my stuff, I can see others working on they're saying the same things, feeling the same feelings, struggling with the same struggles. And so I don't feel like I'm alone. So whether you want to do this work in a group, or whether you want to do this work one on one with me or as a couple or as a family, however, it works out, we're going to set that up and we're going to find out for you. So you don't have to be in these struggles anymore.

Why? Why be in if you don't have to, why not have the tools if they're readily available? And not just tools but how to use them step by step how to use them. You get to have that. All right, you guys know that you are loved. Know that you're appreciated for bringing in big squishy hugs.

And I want to thank those of you that have been calling me this week and saying I've seen your recording. I love it. I didn't have the words for what I wanted to say. But when I heard your recording, made me cry. That just touches me so much.

Thank you guys so much for sharing your thoughts and sharing your stories and sharing how this impacts you. Because my love language is words of affirmation. And when you tell me those things and you share your stories, you might be like, Oh, she doesn't want to hear I want to hear even those of you who have been my past clients, thank you for continuing to share with me what's working, and how you're continuing to use the tools.

It just reminds me how God is using me. That reminds me of all of what I went through as a little kid and a teenager in my 20s and still through till now. And it was worth it. Because it's helping you create that change in your life. It's helping me create this change in my life. It's helping families communicate.

It's helping brothers and sisters get along. It's helping fathers and Sons talk to each other in a way they may never have had in 60 years. You guys it's just it makes me fall in love every time I hear it. So thank you for sharing keep sharing, please. And also keep sharing because then other people can see what's possible. I love you guys so much take care of yourself, Ciao for now I gotta stop sharing the screen. All right, bye.